queennubian:

tw: rape

(via thegirlon)

Dan Savage: Why Monogamy Is Ridiculous

(via greg69sheryl)

Ask anyone who’s married or in a relationship of more than a few years: long-term commitment is HARD. Lately a few of my married friends have admitted that they’re feeling attracted to men who aren’t their husbands, and the guilt is just crushing them. It got me thinking: what makes lust for others start and what (if anything) makes it stop?

Attraction is a force nearly impossible to describe; only poets do it justice. We feel it; we don’t spend time analyzing it. And yet so many of us end up in sexless marriages or long-term relationships that deaden over time. Some get the two-year itch, the five-year itch, and the seven-year itch. But damn it – it’s quite an itch, and not scratching it can lead to frustration, projection, and depression. Also, divorce…………

For many of us, the urge to couple up is a strong one. It might even be programmed into our DNA. But does love mean never dating or having sex with other people?

Several years ago, I decided to challenge the idea that the only way to a loving, committed relationship was to be monogamous. My then-boyfriend and I decided to try an open relationship. We were committed to each other, referred to each other as boyfriend and girlfriend, and were both allowed to date and be physically intimate with other people. We eventually broke up (for various reasons, most of which weren’t related to our openness), but since then I’ve remained interested in rethinking relationships—and it turns out I’m not alone…………………………

(via pervingyou40)

Please don’t define me.

It’s an overriding theme for people to use stereotypical definitions for labels. No wonder the anti-label camp stands strong. And no group is innocent of doing it. It’s a genuinely widespread problem in the mainstream and in the leather, poly, and LGBT communities to which I belong.

I have had a shift in labels, lifestyle, and who I am lately…………

When the new Canadian census figures were released this week, there was a lot of talk about the rise in single-person households, as well as same-sex pairings and unmarried couples with children. But another variety of domestic arrangement continues to fly below the radar of demographics: those that involve more than two adult romantic partners….

(via theonlybella)

Republican presidential candidate Newt Gingrich’s ex-wife has said they divorced after she rejected his request for an “open marriage”.

People in open marriages have told the BBC that if her version of events is true, the former House Speaker broached the subject the wrong way……

Open marriages can work, and have worked for thousands of couples over decades if not centuries. However, there’s much more involved in maintaining an open marriage than simply asking for one. Such relationships require an ongoing commitment to communication and mutual support, and will almost certainly involve some journeying in the vulnerable territories of jealousy, insecurity and anger – but what marriage does not?

Because we only hear about the ones that do. If a three-way or an affair was a factor in a divorce or breakup, we hear all about it. But we rarely hear from happy couples who aren’t monogamous, because they don’t want to be perceived as dangerous sex maniacs who are destined to divorce……..